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Are you worried by issues like these?
- Internet pornography use is causing problems in your life and/or relationship
- You feel the need to watch increasingly “extreme” material online
- You are visiting chat rooms to have fantasy sexual relationships
- You are acting out sexually with other people via your webcam
- You flirt with other people even though this could put your relationship at risk
- You are visiting prostitutes
- You cheat on your partner repeatedly and seem unable to stop
- You are able to find sexual partners easily but the relationships never last
- You feel uncomfortably aroused by strangers in public places
- You want or you have same sex experiences but do not see yourself as gay
- You find certain objects or behaviours sexually arousing
- You have been arrested because of your sexual behaviour
Then you are probably a sex addict and I can help. I am a highly qualified counsellor, psychosexual therapist and sexual addiction therapist with 33 years' experience.
You may find it helpful to have an initial session with me to explore how sexual addiction therapy might help you. I can normally offer a first appointment quickly including Saturday mornings.
More information on the sexual addiction therapy I provide can be found further down the page, for times and prices please see counselling services. For individual and couple counselling and sex therapy please see my other website.
If you are interested in booking a session or have a question or concern, then please contact me.
What do I offer?
You may be unsure what sexual addiction therapy involves and how this might help. I can assess your issues at an initial sessions and advise you on the best way forward.
Individual Sexual Addiction Therapy
Sexual addiction usually has its roots in past events. These can include:
- how you learned to deal with other people as a child (attachment)
- events that have troubled you:
- a single traumatic event such as abuse
- a series or pattern of events that taken together have has a traumatic effect (complex trauma).
- early or extensive exposure to pornographic material.
Individual sexual addiction therapy involves first taking a detailed personal history and identifying the likely causes of your addiction and then agreeing a treatment programme with specific goals. The treatment programme is likely to include:
- confirming the nature and extent of your addiction
- making an honest assessment of the impact of your addiction
- assessing how motivated you are to change
- understanding the causes of your addiction
- working out how to control your addiction in the short term by changing your behaviour, for example identifying and avoiding things that trigger your addictive behaviour
- understanding how addiction in general and sexual addiction in particular develops and persists in the brain
- exploring the feelings of guilt and shame associated with your addiction
- identifying how your thinking maintains your addiction
- developing new ways of thinking about sex and emotional intimacy that reduce your desire to act out sexually and eventually remove it
- developing new behaviours based on this new thinking that ensure that you have healthy, pleasurable alternatives to sexual acting out.
Group Sexual Addiction Therapy
Group sexual addiction therapy usually precedes or follows individual therapy. It can help you to fully understand your addiction and how to overcome it by working with a group of people facing similar challenges.
Whilst the idea of group work may seem daunting experience, shows that it is often a crucial part of your recovery. You may wish to look at the Paula Hall recovery course - see thelaurelcentre.co.uk for more details of the course.
Alternatively there are various twelve-step groups such as Sexaholics-Anonymous, Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, and Sex Addicts Anonymous.
What does sexual addiction therapy involve?
Individual Sexual Addiction Therapy
The normal pattern for delivering individual therapy is weekly sessions of one hour. I may suggest that you do some tasks at home such as looking at your triggers or recording your thoughts and feelings.
If you are in a relationship it may be helpful in the early stages for your partner to attend for a small number of sessions and then to possibly re-join the therapy later to look at the impact on your relationship. Alternatively I can recommend therapists to work with you as a couple.
I can be flexible to meet your needs but I balance this against what is likely to be most effective for you.
Group Sexual Addiction Therapy
The group sexual addiction Paula Hall Recovery course runs over 16 weeks including one non-residential weekend.
Supervision for Counsellors and Other Professionals
I also offer supervision of practice to counsellors and other professionals. Please see my supervision website for further information.
